Bonds That Bind
by Nadja Lee
Summary: A strange, close and painful bond exists between Xavier and Scott. One that is built on pain, punishment, love and dependence.


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Bonds That Bind

By Nadja Lee 6/07/02

English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.

Disclaimer: "X-men" and all the characters here belong to Marvel, 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.

Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.

Timeline: Set in the movie universe/AU. After movie

Universe: Set in the movie universe; NOT the book which goes with it.

Romance: None

Summary: A strange, close and painful bond exists between Xavier and Scott. One that is built on pain, punishment, love and dependence.

Archiving: Want, ASK, take, have.

Feedback: Yes, please. My e-mail address is nadjalee2000@hotmail.com

Rating: R

Warning: Contains strong images of pain, violence and child abuse. May be disturbing for some readers.

Sequel/series: None

Dedicated to Sorcieré who again sent a plotbunny my way………..on a dare of course *LOL*……oh, and this time I think VivaGlam is also to blame because she sent those Witchblade covers to Sorcieré……*EG*

Thanks to Estelle for the Beta.

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"Come to me. We need to talk, Scott."

He had known those words would come. Ever since Logan had left the mansion earlier that day he had known it would come. He had known it since the mission last night. They had barely made it out alive and Rogue had only survived thanks to Logan, a loner who wasn't even part of the team. He had been a bad leader; nearly gotten the entire team killed or worse. Xavier had a right to be disappointed.

The darkened corridor he walked through reminded him of all the walks he had made through these same corridors as a child, going towards this same room and against his will his childhood fears returned. He tried to fight it; he was twenty-three years old now and not a frightened child. He would face the punishment he had coming with the dignity fitting his age. As he kept walking the fear in him got stronger and the feeling of helplessness was overwhelming. He would do this, he wasn't a child anymore. He tried to convince himself that and he almost succeeded until he opened the door to the Danger Room and saw that the room looked exactly the way it always had; black soundproof walls, chains handing from the ceiling and different kind of tools laying on a nearly table. It was as taken out of his memories and his nightmares. He sank hard.

"It is a sign of bad manners to stand in the door, Scott. I had thought I had taught you better than that," a deep and dark voice commented. The voice he heard in his nightmares talking so harshly to him yet the same voice spoke so kindly to him in his most pleasant dream.

Scott quickly went inside and closed the door; it never even occurred to him not to obey; he had learned that lesson long ago and he had learned it well. 

"Come closer."

Scott moved further into the half dark room until he stood in the middle of the room. Without turning his head he tried to scan the darkened corners to locate the owner of the voice but his glasses that coloured everything in a red shade made it an impossible task for him. Fear rose in him and he tried to fight it; tried to stand still and be quiet. He waited, and waited for the inevitable yet not a sound came. The silence became unbearable.

"I know……." he started.  
"Silence! Do not speak unless spoken to!" The voice was harsh as the crack of a whip. Scott immediately shut up and regretted his inability to be still. 

"That's better," the voice said, a mix of pleasure and satisfaction yet also disgust in it. Despite his best effects Scott felt glad over the note of pleasure his obedience had brought.

"I'm very disappointed in you, Scott," the voice spoke again and the anger was back, barely held in check. Scott sank and fought the impulse to wipe the sweat from his forehead. This didn't look good at all.

"I am sorry," he said softly, knowing those words meant nothing.

"Yes. Yes, you are," the words were said with such carelessness that Scott winched. There was silence again for what felt to Scott for a very long time but was probably no more than a minute until he heard the owner of the voice draw a deep breath.

"I took you in, raised you, and gave you everything. You are like a son to me. What shall I do when you disappoint me like this?" there was anger and a hint of sadness in the voice. Scott fought an old urge to break free; the voice of free will was so deeply buried it was an easy task.

"Whatever you wish. I only wish to serve you." Once, right after he had been brought here he had fought, he had lived on the streets and lived only by his own and the street's law of the strongest's survive. But all that had changed. Here he had learned what love really was…..and it was beautiful and very painful. It was confusing yet so clear-cut it was frightening. Then the words he had just spoken would have brought a bitter taste to his tongue but not anymore; he had said them too many times and by now he meant them.

"Yes," as the words were spoken a command was made to the control system of the room and the chains from the ceiling were lowered. Knowing what was to come, having done this many times before, Scott went to his knees and while the chains were still loose locked the first one and then the other handcuff around his wrists. When he was finished a new command made the chains retreat up into the ceiling and Scott clashed his teeth tightly together while his arms where forced upwards and over his head as he was pulled up to hang by the power of his arms. The strain was agonizing and Scott hoped this would either be quick or he would pass out but that all depended on which mood his punisher was in.

"You do know why I have to do this, right?" the voice was strangely soft now, almost kind. Despite the pain Scott smiled, happy to hear that hint of love in the voice again.

"Yes. I let you down."

"So you did," it was a statement of fact; nothing more. Scott tensed and waited for whatever it was there was planned for him but nothing came and the anticipation was almost as agonizing as the strain in his arms. Already his wrists were beginning to bleed, the blood running warm down his arms.

"It is strange, don't you think? Here you are before me again; like a child yet you're a man. You have the power to get away now, but you never do. You can't. We're bound together; you and I," the voice explained but Scott was only half listening; the strain was getting so painful it was clouding his ability to think clearly. 

"Don't you agree? Answer me!" the voice was hard and commanding and Scott felt a familiar tingling in his brain before he let out a loud yell of pain as it felt like his entire body was on fire. It's all in my mind, he tried to convince himself but the illusion of pain was so real his body believed it was really happening and the pain was unbearable. As suddenly as it had begun did it end and Scott drew his breath in small gasps, his breathing harsh and troubled, sweat running down over his face. Exhausted he hung his head downward, trying to focus on the floor to regain some kind of focus.

"Yes. I agree," he got out through trembling lips. Why was he so upset tonight? He understood about the mission but was there something else? Was it because Erik was in prison? Was it Jean? That Logan had left? Scott didn't know and he knew better than to ask; that wasn't how this went as he had learned long ago.

"See? Like father and son; that's us, Scott. Father and son," the voice was closer now and Scott forced himself to lift his head and look at his punisher.

"Yes, Sir," Scott got out and he followed his punisher with his eyes as he drew closer.

"Yes, father," the reprove was softly spoken but a hint of command was still in it.

"Yes……….father," Scott corrected, trying to hide the pain from his voice. Tomorrow all this would be over. It never lasted come daylight. How long was there till the first rays of sun? Five hours? Six? No, he wouldn't think like that. All would soon be over and then things would be better; Xavier would be back and he would hug him, softly kiss his chin, ask him what he wanted for breakfast and tell him he loved him because Xavier did love him; Scott knew he did. Tomorrow, all would be better and he really had brought this upon himself; he should have reacted better, done more. No, he would think about tomorrow………tomorrow would be a good day………..tomorrow.

"That's better. Much better. See? We get along so well so you as you remember to do what I tell you," the voice said apprising yet still Scott noticed this hint of contempt; he had never been able to understand where that contempt came from………contempt for him or himself?

"I always do," Scott mumbled, fighting tears as the strain in his arms now felt like fire.

"Yes, you always do. That is why it always hurts me when I have to hurt you but you understand why it's necessary, don't you?" The voice was almost apologetic now.

"Yes…….I failed," Scott whispered, fear in his voice though he tried to hold it back. Tomorrow.

"Yes……you failed," barely were the words out before Scott felt the familiar stick in his brain.

"No….." the words were barely audible, it had gotten out despite Scott's will to remain calm. However soon he forgot all about calm as pain spread through his nervous system and set his entire body on fire with agony. 

"This hurts me too, son but you know I have to do this," the voice said but Scott was too far gone to understand; the agony so strong all rational thoughts were pushed from his mind. 

Using his telepathy on the man who was like a son to him, tears were in his eyes. A hint of sadness, agony, pain, anger, hate, fear, contempt and love shinned in his eyes and were as craved in stone into the lines in his face as Xavier wheeled closer to finish his punishment. 

"I have to do this," Xavier mumbled, tears running down his face. Have to……..

Tomorrow all would be alright. Tomorrow……….

The End 


End file.
